After considerable deliberation and reflection, I have decided not to pursue the office of the Presidency.
My advisors told me I don't have a shot in hell of winning.
This decision does not come easily or without regret; especially when my potential candidacy continues to be validated by ranking at the top of the Republican contenders in polls across the country.I had a momentary spike in the polls when I started shooting my mouth off then my numbers dropped into the toilet when people actually listened to what I was saying.
I maintain the strong conviction that if I were to run, I would be able to win the primary and ultimately, the general election.I am fucking delusional.
I have spent the past several months unofficially campaigning and recognize that running for public office cannot be done half heartedly.At the Correspondents Dinner Seth Meyers and President Obama made me look like the douchebag I am in front of the whole country, and I couldn't even fire them.
Ultimately, however, business is my greatest passion and I am not ready to leave the private sector.I'm a money-hungry bastard.
There were no organizations. There were also no investigators in Hawaii checking into birth certificates. I'm a lying sack of shit.
... by hosting Celebrity Apprentice, just picked up for another season on NBC.
Which is why I hit the birther bullshit, questioned the president's academic record, and called the Chinese motherfuckers. Because in my foreign policy experience, all one billion Chinese enjoy being called "motherfuckers."It's a compliment in their culture.
In case you missed the Republican talking points, the password is "unsustainable."
...by calling them motherfuckers.
Yes. Shipping jobs overseas, our trade imbalance, and the shoddy, occasionally toxic nature of Chinese manufactured products hasn't come up at all in public debate.
...by firing people on Celebrity Apprentice, now picked up for the 2012 season on NBC.
Hey, I even hired my two incompetent kids as judges on Celebrity Apprentice, now picked up for the 2012 season on NBC.
I have a big fucking mouth and opinions as silly as my hair.
I will sit there and eat shit when Barack Obama takes the oath of office for his second term.
You have to say that at the end of the speech. Me -- I fired God. I looked at God and said: "You're not up to the job as project manager. God-- you're fired."